When did people stop buying people drinks?
Maybe it was around the time bottle service began pushing out the casual drinker, when dance floors became seating spaces and the inception of many a date went from a simple question: ‘Can I buy you a drink,” to a simple swipe right.
When did people stop really communicating?
Maybe it was around the time we started ordering our coffee, pannini’s and pho from apps ?
Maybe it was around the time we stopped talking to each other face to face. When emoji heart eyes began to replace ones with lips and cheeks, full of dimples and tiny eye wrinkles.
Dating has changed. I can say this as I am the perfect test case. I dated for only a brief period from the age of 20-21 – on all other occasions I was simply 14 or in a relationship. When my marriage/relationship fell apart over a year ago, 14 years after we got together, I reluctantly found myself back in the dating world. From what little I had known of it in the early 2000’s, I was totally floored to learn what was really going on. Though I’m pretty aware, I know about all of these apps, platforms and websites (I’ve even encouraged friends in the past to try them out) it was so strange to step into that world myself.
At first I resisted. For one, not in a rush to meet anyone and also I had belief that the best way to meet someone is to get out there. So I got out there and what I was astonished to discover was simply, where are all of the people? Well, yes, there are people everywhere, the coffee shops, bars, clubs in Toronto and all of the cities that I’ve visited as of late have all been packed, but I could literally count on my two fingers how many people (other than the people I was with) I talked to. And yes, I know who I am, I am pretty self aware, I’m shy and also not as young as I used to be, but I do remember, regardless of whether someone was trying to come onto me or not, people talked to each other.
Now more than ever I see people’s head’s on that 60 degree tilt, exploring the depths of their beloved handhelds, talking, sharing and enjoying with the world, just not with the world they are currently inhabiting. Unless of course they are showing the world via Snapchat front facing camera, how much fun they are indeed having.
This is all to say I was equal parts frustrated and interested as I am just as much a part of the problem as I want to be part of the solution. I am guilty for hiding behind my phone, snapping/Insta story-ing many of my moves, but I’m also saddened by it. Saddened because though I can be nervous and shy, there’s nothing like getting to know a stranger, in a random conversation. Saddened because I miss long dinners where people talk to each other and not through a device. Saddened because I miss dancing. I miss dance floors…
We recently started doing Facebook Live mainly because we want to use the tools that we have to discuss topics that affect me and all of you with real live people where wer can communicate with you, albeit through the medium of a Social Media tool, but in real time! We want to discuss things that frustrate us, make us happy, inspire us and move us. Our first FB Live was with my dear friend, Tyrone Edwards who we first introduced you to with 1LoveTO, Rap City on Much Music and The Remix Project. He is now an incredibly dynamic host on the E! network while still working on a million other projects and killing it. We sat down to discuss Dating In The Age Of Social media and had a lot of fun doing it. Check it out HERE
Please join us every Wednesday on our Facebook page where we will discuss a myriad of topics and join the conversation.