most of you probably already  know how i feel about the phrase ‘no homo’…  my friend Ashley (@aashleymac) posted this video and I died, it totally summarizes exactly what I’ve been arguing with everyone about for so long!!

xoxo,

coco

I’m an idea person. I’m a shy person, but I’m an idea person. I only started realizing this over the last little while and the only reason I have become aware of it is because I am finding more and more that other people love to take credit for my ideas. Being an idea person and a shy person are two very uncomplimentary traits. You have a massive flash of genius and get all excited and share it quietly with a few people and poof within days (or sometimes minutes) those people are spouting your little bit of magic with the masses. Although this post might seem to display the contrary, I need little to no affirmation in most areas of my life. I don’t need to be center stage, the topic of conversation or of very much interest to anyone for that matter. I just believe (because I live quietly in my head) that when people have great ideas that someone else taking them as their own without crediting the originator is just foul… For lack of better words.

Tesla VS Edison

That being said this is not a new thing. For example, everyone on the planet probably knows who Thomas Edison is right? Yes, yes, the man who saved us from the darkness and brought us light and electricity and all of the things that make our lives easy and beautiful…. Well not to fast my friends. Nikola Tesla, a well known inventor around the same time as Edison who has been credited for creating such things as the radio and the direct current power system (which we still use today) fluorescent light is not so well known. During the time Tesla worked for Edison it is believed that Edison stole many of Tesla’s ideas for his own which only increased his power and influence. Edison died famous and rich Tesla died poor and alone with only pigeons as friends. *shudder* Although there are arguments and defense of each side, the real point I’m trying to make is that Edison was good at taking credit (even credit he might have not deserved) and he lived a far better life as a result. I’m not advocating the theft of others intellectual capital just merely suggesting that recognition for your own should be paramount.

In one of my favorite books of the year ‘Ambition’ (which I am constantly referring to) Debra Condren discusses ‘taking credit’ in her number 1 rule entitled ‘Be A Contender’.

“I am continually astonished by the number of ambitious, successful women I work with who choose to remain silent-or put themselves through a self punishing, mighty internal battle to justify speaking up or taking action- when someone else spends, or threatens to steal, their intellectual capital.  How many times in your own life can you look back on (with your teeth gritted, no doubt) when you didn’t stick up for yourself when someone took credit for work you’d put your heart and soul into?  Or when you were passed over for someone less talented and who’d made a far less significant contribution that you had, because they were a better boaster?”

As I re-read this chapter I realized 1. I’m not alone, many women suffer from this ‘put my head down and work’ disease and 2. I’ve gotta get over it if I want to go anywhere!  If I don’t want people to take credit for my ideas, then I need to stop letting them.  I’m having hot flashes just thinking about the confrontations that will ensue.  lol!  I just have to keep reminding myself about how awful it feels to congratulate someone else on my brilliant idea.

Do any of you have any tips on taking credit or do you suffer from my ‘hide under a rock disease’?

Thanks for reading!

xoxo,

coco

“Idea’ pic courtesy of www.adverblog.com

I need help on this one.  How do you guys feel about celebrities endorsing diet pills?  Clothing, make up, books, jewelry I get it.  But diet pills, I’m not so sure… Especially because young people are so influenced by celebs.  I am old enough to realize that celebrities are paid to endorse almost everything but even I was interested enough to inquire about Quick Trim Extreme Burn after I read Kim Kardashian tweet that it helped her through her workout.  Even with the knowledge that the only thing that has helped me loose weight has been crazy hard workouts and eating well (and the fact that I’ve tried every diet pill under the sun) I was still interested in seeing if she knew something I didn’t.  

 

Diet pills (from personal experience) are dangerous.  They make you irritable, nervous, increase your heart rate, make you sweat and sometimes give you the shakes.  They get taken off the market all the time because the FDA realizes that they should have never been allowed to be sold in the first place.  There have been many cases where people not only get sick or injured from them, some people have actually died.  Remember Ephedrine?  The little white pill that made you super hyper and helped you shed weight, the one that has a similar chemical make up as methamphetamine.  According to the FDA over 30 deaths have been reported as a result of use of Ephedra.  

 

So like I initially asked, I am genuinely interested in what you think.  Should celebrities just endorse what they want to endorse and be guided by their own personal moral compass or should a higher governing body be able to step in every now and again when things go too far?  Have you tried diet pills before and would a celebrity endorsement pique your interest?

 

xoxo,

coco

p.s. still love you kim…

I saw this on my friend Nebby’s twitter and it made me laugh

 

Someone just said "you look so much better with your own hair and no make up" I don't know if I should be mad or say thank you :I

 

It reminded me of something someone once said to me:

“I always used to say, Catriona would be so hot if she just worked out and ate right”

yikes

 

Backhanded Compliment, Definition: A backhanded compliment or left-handed compliment or asteism is an insult disguised as a compliment. It is generally used to belittle or condescend, or often one uses a backhanded compliment when one wants to insult someone in a subtle way.

I get these kind of compliments all the time because people have a really hard time understanding my life.  I am usually good at brushing them off but I was happy to find out lots of people receive these quasi compliments on the regular.  *sings ‘you are not alone’* lol As a matter of fact, there are websites dedicated to them! 

Here are a few examples of backhanded compliments that I found on the Urban Dictionary:

“Relax, sweetie…you were perfectly adequate.” 
“Your haircut really slims your face.”

And here’s one that Iman said about Michele Obama that I found on tressugar.com 

Mrs. Obama is not a great beauty. But she is so interesting looking and so bright. That will always take you farther. When you’re a great beauty, it’s always downhill for you. If you’re someone like Mrs. Obama, you just get better with age.

OUCH! 

 

Moral of this mini rant is the age old saying ‘if you have nothing nice to say, don’t say anything at all’.  

If you think that I look good now that I lost weight, just tell me I look good, no need to add all that ‘if you would workout stuff’ because as a matter of fact smartie pants, I’ve been working out all my life.  If you think Neb looks better au natural, wait till you see her like that and then tell her how gorge-o she is!  Life is complicated enough without having to figure out what someone’s intentions are, it’s far easier to just be nice.

Spread love. Blow kisses. Hug everyone. Hold on tight. Smile. Shine.

 

 

Love you, even if I don’t know you. Swear.

Have you ever been given a backhanded compliment?  Leave a comment and I wanna know!!!

xoxo,

coco

My Mum just sent me this link under the subject: This poor girl will never be able to go out again!  You MUST read it and then read the comments that follow!!!  

http://www.torontolife.com/daily/style/best-dressed/2009/05/27/torontos-best-dressed-may-27/

Talk about being caught out there!  Basically Deena Pantalone was chosen as a ‘best dressed’ in Toronto Life’s Style section yesterday and she talks about her outfit and how it’s a vintage frock that she brought back to life by altering it.  

REALITY CHECK!  The dress was actually purchased at the super cute store Champagne and Cupcakes on Queen West.  Readers recognized the dress and went bananas in the comments!  It turns out the lady has worn this dress once before and said it was Dior?!?!  

 

All I have to say is, come on Deena, like really? Give credit where credit is due especially when being photographed for a style section which has an online component! You know us fashion hounds can smell a fake from a mile away.  The dress is dope and if she promo’d the store she probably would have gotten a discount for giving the store some love.  This exact thing has happened to my dear friend Kiki and it totally sucks.  Regardless, this scandal has made many a woman irate and will probably sell quite a few dresses as well!

Love to Champagne and Cupcakes for designing a dope dress!  I think I might just pop in there this weekend…

 

xoxo,

coco