What do I want the world to know about being a woman? After continuing to ask myself this over and over again, I couldn’t help but immediately think of things that relate to what society doesn’t tell us about being a woman… or simply things we all know, but need to be reminded of sometimes.
So here it is, world; here is me putting a twist on things (when do I not?) and here are 7 things no one tells you about being a woman.
It’s okay to be assertive; in fact, it’s best.
A friend once shared the quote “Closed mouths never get fed” and it really stuck with me. Women are taught to be problem-solvers, sweet and dismissive.
How are people going to know if you never tell them? Now, whether that be establishing what you’re looking for with the guy you’re casually seeing, or a promotion/raise from your boss, your thoughts and opinions are important enough – remember that.
Stop seeking validation from others.
It’s so easy to play the mirroring game in order to gain acceptance from others. As a young woman, one of the best things I’ve done for myself is to ignore the thoughts that come to mind that have anything to do with me doing something that is purely in order to gain someone else’s validation. Whether that be holding off on ordering a drink on a date, dressing for someone else or simply pretending to be into a TV series you think is dreadful, it’s not worth it if it’s not you.
There is no trade-off between having a family and having a career.
While focusing on yourself is important, it doesn’t mean that being in a relationship and starting a family will set you back from all of your goals within your career. It’s 2018: there is a way to do both – and like a boss, while you’re at it.
You can achieve all of your goals through good old-fashioned hard work.
What I’m really saying is you don’t need a sex tape, a million Instagram followers, and you don’t need to be at the centre of a controversy. Hard work, motivation, determination, intelligence, ambition, resilience, education… these are assets that will get you to your wildest dreams.
Invest in your twenties.
I don’t mean just with your money, I mean with your self-growth, development and even in your own love life. Don’t be too in a rush… seek your self-worth first and all things will follow.
There will be more no’s than yes’s.
Get comfy with the word “no”. AKA overcoming rejection in any aspect of your life will bring you the most success.
The people you will be compared to most in life are other women.
It’ll happen, just don’t fall for it.
And remember, “A flower does not think of competing with the flower next to it. It just blooms.”
There you have it! My 7 things no one tells you about being a woman (and maybe a little lesson or two, too). Wherever you are on this journey we call womanhood, I hope you enjoy it. As always, I want to hear from you in the comments below! Is this totally your experience, do you have some advice of your own?
Photos by Samantha Clarke