life

#SelfLoveClub: How To Set Boundaries At Home, At Work + In Your Relationship

This week’s edition of #SelfLoveClub is a compilation of lessons we’re continuing to learn here at The Cowe, in all areas of our lives. We’ve put together a few takeaways for how to set realistic boundaries at home, at work and in your relationship. These suggestions are relevant for whatever situation you’re in, whether that be as a twenty-something-year-old living solo, with a roommate, or a mama at home with or without a partner and kid(s). The point is, we got you!

This pandemic has really taught us exactly how we don’t want to live our lives when lines are being crossed on a 360 level. I’m sure this is resonating because no matter what we’ve all been put in compromising positions throughout the past year. Read on for how to take the first step of feeling in control of your life.

Setting Boundaries At Home

  • If you live alone, identify areas of your space to serve different purposes and do your best to avoid unhealthy crossover (not mixing work areas with play areas, if possible)
  • Do not work from your bed, we understand if you have to set up shop in your bedroom but please get out of your bed for those back to back Zoom meetings
  • Separate your treats from the nutritious stuff. When at home all day it’s so easy to grab for the salty or sweet decadent snack but if you position these items strategically you’ll set yourself up for success doing those jam-packed WFH days (Pro tip: we put our sweets and treats at the back of the cupboard and healthy snacks at the very front so it’s top of mind)
  • When living with your family or a roommate, with such a small living area it is vital to coordinate with your “housemates” by scheduling fair and reasonable times when you can watch your show in the living room uninterrupted or do a solo workout in the home gym
  • When living with others, communication is key. You need to have open dialogue so that everyone can live comfortably in their own home. Some uncomfortable conversations may need to be had but we promise it’s 1000% worth it when having to be home 24/7
  • We’ve loved implementing a close door policy with roommates. It’s simple, when our bedroom door is closed it’s “me time”, so please let us be alone LOL

Setting Boundaries At Work

  • We find ourselves working longer hours from home and being less productive
  • Start time blocking your schedule and make your “offline” time apparent in a public calendar with your employer and colleagues. You don’t necessarily need to specify “workout” or “self-care” but “offline” relays the message just fine
    • Part two to that is actually putting your phone/computer down during those times “offline” because if you answer during those visibly “offline” times you’re not respecting your own boundaries. If you don’t respect your own boundaries, how can you expect other people to respect them?
  • Stop taking on other people’s tasks because you have “nothing better to do” or all the “time in the world”
  • Just because we can’t physically go somewhere doesn’t mean you shouldn’t take a day off. Request a day off from your employer and actually spend that day detaching from any work-related responsibilities, any responsibilities in general if possible LOL

Setting Boundaries In Your Relationship

  • Remember, your partner’s life doesn’t have to be your life. Even though we’re stuck in the same spaces, keeping space for just you is ok!
  • Further to that, scheduling in you time is where it’s at. Whether it be a moment to meditate or time for a distanced walk with a friend, book it in if you can.
  • I know it feels like we’re constantly communicating but remember that it’s important to not assume your other half can read your mind. When we used to spend way more time apart it was easier to not let things like the way someone is breathing get under our skin, now, not so much. BUT we all know it’s usually about something way bigger than breathing (or maybe you’re just hangry) so take a minute to chat it out, after you have a snack…
  • Take responsibility for your actions quickly. It can get easy to pass off blame or never admit when you’re wrong, especially when you’re annoyed, but taking responsibility for YOUR actions can usually help the other person take responsibility for theirs too.

Don’t forget to celebrate the little wins because as we know, the little wins add up in a major way! You got this. Share with us how you’re setting boundaries in your life by tagging us here.

xx

The Cowe

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